Flatlined
By: Lostwolfe
[title:flatlined]
[six june, two thousand and two]
i won't go into why i've been away so long - that'll just
this story isn't terribly deep.
i bet you know where this is going.
about fifteen or so minutes ago [in the shower, mind you]
as a sidenote - in order to enhance the entire experience,
this, in the tradition of blade, is going to get very
lost-/greywolfe, six june two thousand and two
he is working at home tonight.
my name, in case you have to know is
my other name - the name the computer that bought me into
i lead a double life. and in my working life - the one that
i'd been at work the night before. at my tedious, but
that wasn't the end of it, though. for the last few weeks
so things had been kind of stringy. and i'd been called in
i figured that - since i was fired from work - i may as
when i got to my house, it was completely deserted. there
upon entry, i discovered that they had, indeed, destroyed
i was upstairs, kneeling over a hidden stash of money when
my nerve endings are starting to come alive again. it's
[seven june two, thousand and two]
i'm not prepared for what happens next. my side of the
that's about the point where i get swung back - all i can
"hey, jeff," the bartender yells - his voice is deep,
if a fake 'cop' got me in here, surely the real cops are
but...
the first thing that i'm very aware of is that there's at
while i'm at sorting out the locks for the room and
a while back, i'd decided that i wanted an ancient sword
i sprint for the door - it's the fastest i can go, given
jeff shuts the door, releases me from my cage and picks me
[twelve june, two thousand and two]
it's while leo's talking that the first surprise happens -
[twenty june, two thousand and three]
i'm not quite through the door when i hear the cage begin
there's more than one cell. in fact, there's four of them,
i run up to the next door, literally body-slamming against
they see the lawman, and they slow down, walking right up
when we re-enter the bar, there are catcalls. and loud
what strikes me, though, is that there is no man bleeding
"now," his basso voice rumbles, as he steps over to the bar,
"where's your clothes, boy?"
"why don't you come on up here to the bar, where i can see
[twenty one june, two thousand and three]
he puts a huge paw on my shoulder again and steers me
there aren't any cars this side of the parking lot, except
working as quickly as i can, i shove keys in and out of the
while i'm driving, i pull out the small laptop that makes
i don't know where i am, but this part of the highway looks
i'm not out on the road for more than five minutes, when
i walk for nearly a mile, shivering in the enormous set of
"you're awake?" it's leo.
he wakes me up a little later. it's still evening, but
the construct is a bright, gentle asian man. he enquires
[twenty two june, two thousand and three]
without even batting an eye, leo is sprawled on top of me.
"shit boy, you certainly are a fighter."
the sheriff's heavy gut rests over me as he pounds in and
i can feel heat around me as the sheriff gets closer to his
around my lips, leo is just getting thicker and thicker. i
for what feels like an eternity, but can't be more than a
[twenty three june, two thousand and three]
i'm so weak now that i can't even protest anymore. then, i
right about then, i can hear muffled grunts from high above
his lips touch mine and he presses his mouth over mine, his
panicky, i try and look down - to see if he's lying or not,
inside the warmth, the warmth that literally is the jaws of
somewhere down below, i can feel the warmth creep up around
there's one more powerful tug from the sheriff's throat and
that heavy tongue slobbers over me a last time and then the
the technician, scared little whelp that he is, came to get
knowing that he's going to have to deal with his superiors,
about four hundred pounds. possibly more. probably more,
i'm not sure that i'm totally happy with it - it started in
the second thing i like about this is it's mood - the idea,
this one, though, doesn't "say" anything, really, and that
one sidenote:this *did* turn out to be quite a bit less
[commentry and witticism [or commentry and criticism] can be
thankyou for reading this text file.
[version:1.00/unbastardized]
[author:lostwolfe]
[email:greywolfe@new.co.za]
[date:six june two thousand and two]
-----------------------------------------------------------
[alteration history]
-----------------------------------------------------------
[twenty three june, two thousand and three]
[year numerics translated to words
--> 2002==two thousand and two, and so on...]
[time/date added to the opening section]
[time/date added to the closing section]
[copyright notice section added to contents]
[copyright notice added to end-of-file]
[contents indentation changed]
[was originally scattered towards the right, it makes
more sense now.]
[song replacement:i do not want this --> hunting bears]
[added final song to end section]
[added song --> ruined]
[added song --> darkness]
[added song --> locked out]
[added song --> paranoid android]
[added song --> leave you far behind]
[added song --> road to nowhere]
[added song --> leave your lights on]
[added song --> roads]
[added song --> the eyes of truth]
[added song --> gave up]
[added song --> pyramid song]
[no modifications at this time]
-----------------------------------------------------------
[contents]
[foreward]
[flatlined]
[one]
[zero]
[flatline]
[minus one]
[commentary]
[copyright notice]
-----------------------------------------------------------
[foreward]
-----------------------------------------------------------
welcome to, what is, possibly my first piece of fiction in
a very, very long piece of time.
make you yawn, so instead i'll explain this story a bit, but
suffice it to say that it can be summed up as a combination
of personal issues and my muse going away without leave.
but that's not the point. what this story is about is a
particular ethos and a particular worldview. instead of
writing about the subject as it being all natural, this has
some of the mechanical. i've been asked, off and on to run
shadowrun and cyberpunk games and one of the things i got
curious about was what sort of modifications could be made
to a human body to allow it to do stuff it probably really
shouldn't.
about a month ago, today, exactly, i had a dream about a
particular scenario in which some helpless guy gets dragged
to a bar and then, for the amusement of the patrons, he
gets given some kind of hand weapon and given the choice of
fighting his way out of the bar, or dying.
the last pieces of the puzzle for this story were born.
i've attempted to write a gritty future story before, and
i think the result was sort of a mess. this is a second
attempt at that. i hope everyone enjoys this.
each segment begins life with a specific song playing in
it. the idea here being that you get some kind of 'tonal'
feel for what's going on. i've listed the songs as i think
they ought to occur. if you have them on hand, it might
be worth playing them and listening to them while you read.
if nothing else, it'll amuse you.
violent, very quickly. if you're not partial to blood in
your stories, you may want to steer well clear.
-----------------------------------------------------------
[one]
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:hunting bears, band:radiohead, album:amnesiac]
-----------------------------------------------------------
[time:shortly after dark]
[date:eleven august, twenty one forty three]
-----------------------------------------------------------
the man behind the desk is impressively large - probably
about four hundred pounds. possibly more. probably more,
in fact. he's bearded - and the beard is all silver now.
once, he assures his co-workers, it was all red. then it
turned to steel-red and now there's just traces of red
where the grey has taken over. he is old. no one really
knows how old, but he's been around for well over one
hundred and fifty years. his body technician is very good.
he's an officer of the law - only they don't call it that
these days. these days they call it a peacekeeper. his
job is simple. to keep the peace, at whatever cost. his
branch of the law is pretty autonomous and most of the
'fake cops' - the ones out on the street, have no idea that
his arm of the law exists. this is true for most of the
human herd. they don't know that he exists, and that's
just fine with him. the more circumspect he is, the more
he can get done.
quietly, he puts the little disk which is half organic and
half common digital versatile disk technology into the
little slot of the dedicated computer. he knew the man who
had written the software for this particular device. he's
long dead now.
the disk is tiny in his huge hands. it's compartive older
brother in size is the minidisk, but this holds a *lot*
more informaiton than the minidisk could ever hope to hold.
in fact...this is the story of one particular human life
that came to a tragic end two nights ago. his job is to
find who was responsible. these things sometimes take a
while, so he gets a cigar - he's not allowed to technically
have any of these, some wine and leans back - heavy boots
on the worktable. he slips his tie off and lets it hang
around his bull-neck and fingers the remote control right
up to the point where the dossier sugests that this case
should begin. the night the deceased comes home and finds
his apartment in ruins. this is what he sees:
-----------------------------------------------------------
[time:oh-six-oh-seven-am]
[date:seven august, twenty one forty three]
[cortical shunt memories]
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:ruined, band:imperative reaction, album:severed]
-----------------------------------------------------------
it started out being a shitty day.
well. that's not fair, because the evening before had been
equally shitty, but...it was going to get a whole lot worse
before it was over.
foetus-vd-180615-5135-08-5. yes. the other children with
me did make fun of my abbreviation being vd. for the rest
of you, my name is vernon demille.
it's not a name i would have chosen, but i'm vat born and
the vat born get names as the computer that generated them
decides. being vat born means that your parents didn't want
you. i'm sure that's true of mine. every enquiry into them
is like a giant dead-end. a flatline. a terminal point of
exit.
being could never have foreseen if it had tried really hard,
is hal0.
takes up most of my time, is terribly dull and requires me
to build sourcecode for a giant firm, i have no space for
hal0. or any of the things hal0 can do. mind or body-wise.
but on the street, that's different. hal0 is a hacker.
one part of a huge cartel of hackers. you get business,
then you get business with a capital b. we're the latter.
if you ever wanted to know what made the world go around,
think corporate espionage. without corporate espionage,
and buyouts and all that shit, none of us would be here
today.
necessary, very dull job at a firm called transtech. it
had been a shitty evening. when i got there, all the
terminals were down and i was forced to have a social
conversation at the coffee station with emily watkins.
she's got a wife and two children. and she was telling me
all about them. again. i, somehow, politely excused
myself, by exclaiming that i thought i saw a terminal come
back online.
things had been stringy in terms of my job, and i'd taken
to hacking from inside the system. this was generally
thought of as a bad idea. particularly in hacker circles
the world over, but...i figured i was good enough to be
able to cover my tracks. and the cheese-ass firewall and i
were good friends anyway.
the latent system that ran the firewall and didn't really
know about itself was a lobotomized human brain. and it
liked conversation and porn as much as the next guy, so
every couple of nights, i'd sneak out, ride the firewall
and play chess with it. or whatever made it my friend.
i do admit to having a fondness for the firewall. in about
the same way as i thought the virtual dogs that were common
about three years ago were cute. i'd bought one and still
had it. it was my only companion.
for a performance evaluation and my immediate superious
basically told me that i had exactly tonight to ship out.
i guess i got caught. that didn't seriously bother me, it
was really more of a hassle than anything else. i could
just go into the police records, find my own record and
clear it, but it was going to be a nuisance.
well clear my name from work - one last hack wasn't going
to make it any worse than it already was. and that's
about when i saw all the activity surrounding my house.
fuck. me.
i think everything's starting to catch up now.
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:darkness, band:peter gabriel, album:up]
-----------------------------------------------------------
i flew down to my house. there was no sense in panicking,
since they were already there, but perhaps i could salvage
some of my stuff before it was completely destroyed. the
police would know i was a hacker, but probably wouldn't
know how to look for evidence. at least, that's what i was
banking on. i hadn't heard of too many hackers who wanted
to actually get involved with the police. as far as we
were concerned, they weren't much different from their
antescendants. what had been the 'jock' set. who had all
the testosterone, all the looks, but none of the brains of
the 'geek' set. us.
was no one there to tell me what was going on. clearly
they'd decided they could catch me better if they found me
at work. which would have been true, if it wasn't for the
fact that i'd been fired.
this gave me some time to collect stuff from the house and
start for a shelter where they'd possibly take me in. all
i needed was a roof over my head and a public terminal.
any public terminal would do.
everything i owned. they were probably looking for some
way into my computer, which i never kept anywhere near my
machine. all of the security locks on my computer were
keyed to me. that and only i knew the passwords for some
of the locks. i never wrote them down and i never said
them out loud. when you're a hacker, paranoia is your
friend.
i found out that i wasn't completely alone, but by then
it was already far too late. i was sprawled, face-down
over the little cubby. he hadn't knocked me senseless,
as i thought he would, ordinareily have done, instead he'd
just short-circuited every nerve-ending i had.
i knew it was a he, because, shortly after he'd done that,
he picked me up, put me over his shoulder and took me down
to his police cruiser. i guess we were going for a little
spin.
-----------------------------------------------------------
[zero]
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:white lightning, band:sister machine gun,
album:metropolis]
-----------------------------------------------------------
i can see light through the bars of the little, clandestine
cell. it's very clean. there's no bed. this is
disquieting, since it suggests temporary storage. which
also suggests that wherever this 'cop' had taken me, it
wasn't really a jail. it just looked like one.
taken all of an hour and i have needles and pins all along
my fingers and toes and legs. as i'm starting to pull
myself towards myself i sit up. that's when the door
opens. some huge ogre of a guy is here to torment me.
he picks me up and puts me against one of the walls.
deep basso voice coming form the pit of his stomach:
"hey. hey there lil fuck. are you awake yet?"
i nod.
"can't hear you lil fuck."
with that, a giant, meaty hand slaps my face. i can feel
a tooth break and some blood ooze from one of my lips
futilely, i spit the rest of the blood - and the tooth onto
the floor.
"yeah. i'm awake." i manage.
"very good, lil fuck. very good. i'm sure you don't
realize it now, but you've slept the day away and it's time
for me to take you out to meet everyone."
i have?
what...?
i have no time in which to respond. he's very deftly
pulling my clothes off my body. ripping them off, in
fact.
within seconds, i'm naked. there's no sense in trying to
go after my clothes, because they're in tatters. he lifts
me up, over his shoulder, and proceeds to cart me out of
the only door in the cell. the door i hadn't seen before.
instead of leading me up the passage and out towards the
'jail,' he heaads the other way - to another door i hadn't
seen. mostly due to the light, but also because it, like
the jail-cell door is coated with camoflauge polymer. that
means that it looks, feels and acts like regular wall,
until the right hand finds it's handle and pulls it open.
more concretely this means that from one end, the door
looks like a door, but from the other it looks like a wall.
door, the side that is a jail-cell is quiet. the other
side of the door - the side that isn't a jail turns into
a huge, sprawling loud noise. it's a bar.
my first clue that it's a bar is that there's an argument
with the bartender. as the ogre swings me around to close
the door behind himself i catch a very quick look at my new
surroundings. there's a light, almost like it's coming
from the sky, shining down on what appears to be a huge
man. as a quantifier this doesn't help much, because the
guy trying to buy a drink is also huge. the guy behind the
counter must be six foot tall and must weigh just over
three hundred and fifty pounds. his beard streams down his
face in gentle silver waves.
see now is the door of the place as he carries me ever
further into the bar. with four short strides, he dumps me
over the counter of the bar and behind it.
sonorous, "don't spill the fucking merchandise like that."
the ogre - jeff - looks back at him and shrugs. there's
bad blood here.
"he's going to be dead soon."
"i don't give a fuck. i don't pay you to mishandle the
boy."
my head won't stop spinning from jeff's declaration.
very gently, the bartender leans over me and takes a look
at my lip. "how many teeth?" he asks.
"just one," i reply.
"fuck."
"what's your name, boy?"
"venon."
"mine's leo." he reaches out a huge hand and clasps mine.
for a second i can't see my hand, i can feel it as his
engulfs mine.
"you want something to drink? it's all on the house for
you."
i nod. i ask for coffee. i haven't had any since the
machine at work went bust.
he grins through his beard and goes off to make it. i
think he keeps some for himself, because it takes less than
half a minute for him to put together. he comes back,
pressing the warm mug into my hand.
"why'd jeff say i was going to die?" i ask.
"because you are," he replies. it's a very casual
statement. kind of like talking abuot the weather, or the
latest computer platform.
deep inside, i feel something slip.
"why?"
"we...have a custom here. it's called 'jackrabbit.'
you're the rabbit. they're the jacks. there's two rules.
if you make it to the exit without anyone catching you, you
leave. we never harass you again. if someone catches you,
they get to do what they want to you."
"that doesn't mean i'm going to die."
"some of the men here are very...perverse."
he says the last like he can't make up his mind which word
to use.
"there is some good news," he says, his voice deep.
"you get a weapon of your choice."
and with that, he pushes a button under the bar. doors
that were invisible, turn visible and he gently steers me
into the little room.
"you go in there and think about what you want to come out
with. you've got four hours. i call you at nine, unless
you want to come out sooner. if you want anything, you
ring the bell."
he points a thick arm to a little push-panel button, much
like the one he must have pressed to activate the doors,
which is the only glowing thing in the dark room. it's
got a little bell symbol on it. i walk into the room.
i have no other choice.
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:locked out, band:crowded house, album:together alone]
-----------------------------------------------------------
as i do, the doors whisk shut behind me. i'm immersed in
total darkness for a second until the lights come on. they
seem to warm up - like they're not used often. and there,
in glass cases, in front of me are rows upon rows of hand
crafted, vrey expensive weapons. very quickly i take a
look at the selection and notice that there are no guns.
no stun-rods. no ranged weapons at all.
thta's going to make this a lot more difficult than it
seemed at first. and then it finally does begin to sink
in. tonight, i go free, or i die.
there's a panicky half a minute when i think that i'm going
to give right into the panic, but then i don't. everything
changes in that split second.
there's a terminal in this room.
still looking for me?
if the real cops are still looking for me, surely they'll
still want to arrest me?
very desperately, i hope. and yes, there is, indeed, a
jack. there's also a flatscreen panel and a swiping
device. i assume each weapon has a barcode and the
terminal spits back what each weapon is and what it's
capable of. i don't see speakers, but i suspect that this
is built for illiterate people, because of the bar scanner.
i suspect there's a keyboard in the panel just below the
terminal. pushing a hand against what looks like a
'drawer,' i find i'm right. a keyboard slides out in front
of me and a chair folds up from the ground.
and then the little worm of doubt enters my mind. if there
are fake 'cops' then surely they'll be listening for
signals like this one. and they'll stop the actual police
force from intervening. i need a far better plan than the
original one.
i slip into the chair and the terminal powers up. it has
a clock in the upper right hand corner of the screen. i've
got a little more than four hours. it's now 17:47. leo is
going to come in at ten and take me out of here. i need
to act fast.
least one camera in this room. i have to trick it into
showing leo the right picture. luckily, i'm equipped for
that and it's trivial. using the hardware in my head, i
scan the barcodes of each weapon. then i scan pictures of
each weapon. the only time i ever pick up a weapon is to
record one fetch-and-swip routine. the first simple hack
i perform is to get the terminal to spit back the entries
of the weapons, while routing a plausible
stand-look-fetch-swipe-ponder routine into the camera. it
has to look like i'm considering the weapons. with that
done, i start to disarm the terminal. it has many, many
locks and bolts. some of which are software driven and
some of which are hardware driven. but i've been in locked
room scenarios before. i understand the parameters of the
situation pretty well.
defusing the myriad traps, i start hacking the bar. it's
important that i know what's going on outside the room.
that's when i see leo making a call.
in fact, he's making dozens of them, in between pouring
shots for customers and at eight - according to the timer
on the terminal, he kicks out the drunks and shuts the bar
down entirely.
it's just leo and jeff.
now's the best shot i haev at escaping.
as stealthily as i can, i hack the front doors of the bar.
they've got locks that will only open to his touch from the
inside, but that's easy enough to find and forge. i keep
that pattern in memory so that i can project it onto my
hand when the time comes to get out and then i ring the
bell.
as a weapon. and it was going to come in handy now.
i lift it off it's rack and heft it. it has a little pouch
for a software controlled unit - probably to change what it
can do, but i have no time to program a unit that i can
hardwire and use, so i just have to take it as it is - a
light, very efficient, very sharp sword.
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:paranoid android, band:radiohead, album:ok, computer]
-----------------------------------------------------------
leo comes for me.
"what?"
"i want to come out."
he nods. i almost can't believe it. he has no idea of
what has been going on behind his back. very gingerly,
i step out of the little room and he seals it shut behind
me. i lay my sword on the counter and ask for a cup of
coffee. he obliges.
jeff is somewhere out in the shadows of the bar, moving
air-pool tables out of the way and pushing them up against
the walls. he's making the coffee. this is going to be
about as good as it gets.
grabbing the sword, i vault the bar itself and begin to
sprint for the door. he doesn't see in time and i hope,
i pray - that neither does jeff.
that i haven't made any modifications to this part of my
body and i make it. i don't turn around and look, i just
press my hand to the little panel on the side of the door
and project the image of leo's huge hand onto mine instead.
it seems to work - the door opens and i can see the
outside, but instead of things going exactly as i planned,
a cage comes down around me. i can see the outside - i can
see that i'm in a deserted area, but i'm trapped.
i turn to see jeff advancing on me. leo hasn't broken out
into a sweat, in fact, he's waiting patiently, sitting at
a barstool with my coffee next to him. he's admiring the
sword.
up. he seems a lot more agitated than leo is. he's not
gentle about walking me back to the bar and dumping me back
behind it.
"stupid cunt," he says. "more trouble than he's worth."
leo looks daggers at him.
"i think i'm terminating your contract tonight."
jeff looks shocked, and i grin on the inside. i still
can't figure out if leo's on my side or not. it's like
he's trying to be...
he points me to my coffee and carries on admiring the
sword, going so far as to get a cloth to wipe the blade.
"you sure this is the one you want?"
i nod. i'm crestfallen. the one shot i had at this
working has backfired.
"i remember where i got this. it's from judge-general
stephenson." he looks for the little slot. "he says he
used to keep pictures of his wife and children in there.
didn't like using it as a modified sword. figured that it
was in complete contradiction to the old ways."
"i dont' want to die."
he shrugs.
"how many hacks have you done that lead you close to the
brink of death?"
i start - this is entirely unexpected information.
he grins when he sees my reaction.
i don't have to think. there are only two instances other
than this one.
"two."
"are you dead yet?"
i shake my head.
"how do you rate your success on this one so far?"
"not very good."
he nods. he pushes the little button that opens the door
to the locked room.
"you've still got an hour and forty five minutes."
back into the room.
the door shuts. the light comes back on. the teriminal
blinks at me from it's corner of the room. an hour and
forty five minutes. i'm not out of good ideas yet, so i
sit back down at the terminal and start placing calls of
my own - i know now - at least i think i do, that leo is
probably somehow watching this, or recording this, although
i can't figure out how.
there's enough point in being stealthy about it, though
that i don't let down my guard. he might know what i'm
doing, but he doesn't have to know everything.
from time to time i look up - the bar starts filling up.
but it's filling up in a way i don't understand. no one
here is under forty. they're all huge. just like leo.
what's also interesting is that they never look at the
door. they must know...
slowly i start building a brand new plan - defusing other
parts of the bar as i work - calling the real cops.
arranging for transport out of this hell, but then
something occurs to me - and a worm of doubt creeps into
everything. that little worm is burrowing at everything,
but i have no good way of checking it.
if this is a locked room, and the terminal has it's own
internal messaging system that can break out of the
network, where is it breaking out to? and *why* is it
breaking out to the greater network of the internet.
surely if this is meant to be a locked room leo wouldn't
want the 'rabbit' escaping?
i check my assumption - that all the traffic i'm sending
via the network is being routed by very specific servers,
to a very particular hole in the internet. it's not.
i have a real live connection to the world. but
something's wrong.
the panic builds. i can't let the panic build.
fuck. there's something obvious i'm not seeing.
and then, things i've known for years begin to start going
missing. things i should know start vanishing out of my
head. i don't know how.
outside, in the bar, there's fifteen people.
21:07.
seventeen people.
21:23.
twenty one people.
21:37.
i work frantically at the little keyboard of the
workstation. i've contacted the police, i've got a friend
of mine coming over to pick me up. i've got surprises in
store for the bar and it's patrons. everything should be
ready...and yet...something feels wrong.
21:41.
i ring for leo.
i ask for coffee.
it takes me the next seventeen minutes to drink the coffee.
i'm drinking it as slowly as possible and trying to think
about what could be wrong. it's 22:58 when i throw the
styrofoam cup into the trash. my eyes are closed for the
next two minutes, reviewing. i know what i haev to do. i
know the people involved know what *they* have to do...
i open my eyes as the room goes dark and jeff comes to
fetch me. big hands take my arms and put them behind my
back. a knife at my neck. no chances now.
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:leave you far behind, band:lunatic calm, album:matrix
soundtrack]
-----------------------------------------------------------
as i'm being dragged out by the huge ogre and the lights
are going out...it occurs to me. i know precisely why
it's going to fuck up.
and there's no way i can stop it.
the sword's in my right hand, but the point is pushed in,
the last thing jeff wants to do is be hurt.
when the door shuts in front of my eyes...i get turned
around to face them. i can't count them, but i figure
there can't be more than the twenty one i saw at las count,
but they're all huge. not one of them is smaller than leo.
not one of them is *younger* than leo.
i'm put on the bar-counter. my sword is at my side - it's
ath this point that jeff feels it prudent to move off - he
melts into the crowd. i can't get the image of the last
thing i saw in the room out of my mind. or...the last
thing i remembered. i'm looking down at twenty five
bearded, huge faces and leo's telling them something, but
it doesn't make a difference.
the lights go completely dark. i'd found a way to
short-circuit the bar. and by god...it worked, but that
would.
after that, i forgot to panic. i had to get out of here
and i only had a limited number of tricks up my sleeve,
this was one of them. rememberig where i was and
remembering the drawing in my head, i picked up the sword
and slid - from my end of the bar-top to where i remembered
the dropoff being. tipping my head backwards, i pushed
what i hoped was the switch for the blade - i could hear it
slide out as i felt my legs go over the edge of the bar -
into another man. bringing the sword around as fast as i
could, i felt impact...and then something...parted.
i felt what could only be blood spray out my way. and then
there are bodies - so many warm bodies around me. i can't
help what i do next - my sword arm goes back and around in
an arc and slices through more of them. there are yells of
surprised pain now as i feel some of them shrink back and i
can see the light i know i'm headed for. it's the only
other door in the complex - and probably the only door that
doesn't have safety overrides. that's my hope, anyway.
i run towards the light, and as it gets nearer, i can feel
the throng of men behind me press in tighter. i know the
object of the excercise - now that the closest ones to me
know i have the sword, is to take me down from behind, but
i also know one thing they don't. without breaking my
stride, i move the sword to my left hand - i'm not going to
have enough time to put it down and pick it up and i need
my right hand more than i do my left one. i get to the
light - the door - the press of bodies behind me is
overwhelming, but they're still afraid of grabbing me. i
guess that sword must be a little worrying. in the
darkness, the handplate that opens the hidden door that
leads to the 'jail cell' lights up like fireworks. if the
patrons of the bar didn't know where i was before, they do
now.
imprint.
imprint.
goddamn. imprint.
the door swings towards me as it opens. grabbing it, i
let leo's fake prints go in my head and press, a last time,
against the handplate. my own handprint, this time.
to descend. i have to be quick. running through, i pull
the door shut and i can hear it as a large body slams
against the metal bars of the cage. it isn't going to take
leo and jeff very long to get the cage up and to get the
door open. i know i have to keep moving. keep moving, or
die. that's how hunters do it, isn't it? they stalk the
rabbit and keep it afraid until it passes out from
exhaustion. and my run has only just started. yelling, as
i keep moving, i make the lights of the 'jail' turn on.
there's going to be no point in running, if i can't see
where i'm going.
side by side. i streak past them, checking to see if what
i had managed to find out about the building is true -
there are no more 'rabbits.' it's very seriously time to
get out of this hell-hole. i just hope that the people i
contacted got my messages. it wouldn't do if my getaway
wasn't...well, ready to get away.
it as i press my hands against it. openopenopen. and it
does. only...there's someone else waiting outside.
-----------------------------------------------------------
[flatline]
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:leave your lights on, band:everlast and santana,
album:harris t. ford sings the blues]
-----------------------------------------------------------
i lift the sword up into the air, arcing it backwards,
ready to strike and it is then that i notice the badge,
held scant inches from my face.
"i'm the law, boy. you've got nothing to fear now."
and i sink to my knees. the nightmare is over.
behind me, i can hear jeff and leo, storming down the
hallway, reaching me - and then looking at the open door.
behind me.
"you have to get me out of here," i say, quietly, so that
only the cop will hear me.
"that's what i'm here to do, boy." he says, deep voice
rumbling over me. "now, what the fuck is going on here?"
i stand up again and turn around, facing leo and jeff.
the two of them look over at me - look at the cop and then
leo decides that there's no point in arguing with the law.
"he was trying to get away."
"i guess i'm going to have to check this out." behind me,
the cop places a paw on my hand and pushes me in. "do i
have to go?" i ask. the last thing i want to do is go
back in there. there's probably many men in there who
would want me dead, now.
"yeah, boy. i need you to tell me what happened."
shit.
i nod and obey, walking in a little entourage, behind leo
and jeff, with the cop behind me. together, we walk back
past the cells, all the way to the bar. the cop isn't
asking about the cells - i assume this must come later.
instead, he just follows on, behind jeff and leo, their big
bodies leading the way. once again, i find myself in the
bar. behind me, the door that leads to the 'jail cells'
closes.
whoops. clearly the men think that, seeing me, i was
caught. when they see the cop, though, they go silent.
to death from when i came here last - and it couldn't have
been two minutes ago? suddenly that fear creeps right back
into the edge of my mind, but...this guy's a cop. i called
the cops, didn't i?
"why don't you come over here and tell sheriff wolf what
happened here, boy."
i don't move.
"aww, now, boy. i'm not gonna hurt you. these guys might
have, but i certainly wouldn't." i'm not sure. that worm
of doubt is back.
that last thing i saw before i left the room.
those numbers. i was...sure...
i look over at the sheriff, taken a bit aback.
"he tore them off me," i reply, pointing at jeff.
the sheriff nods. he beckons me over and i go.
"well, it's ok, boy. can always get more clothes, later."
he seems to grin then, and scratches at his stomach. i
notice, belatedly, that he's another big man. i don't know
how big, but he's about leo's size. maybe larger. three
hundred and seventy pounds? more?
that you're ok?" in the back of my mind, alarm bells go
off, but...shouldn't there be a medical check up at the
police station? the sheriff just grins wide. his
moustache reminds me of the tusks of a walrus. long and
flowing and curving downwards.
i turn on my heels and start stalking out, towards the
jail cell door. i think he's going to let me go, but he
just ambles right on over to where i'm standing and spreads
his legs apart, massive arms blocking my path.
"look. i'm here to help you. i can't file any kind of
suit against these bastards, if i can't determine that any
harm came to you, understand?"
i shrink back, away from him.
towards the bar. "up." he commands.
and i obey.
"give me the sword."
i hesitate.
"give me. the fucking. sword."
and then i do something i don't plan. it just happens.
one second the thought is in my head and the next, it's
written across his face, as i drive the sword deep into
his overhanging gut. i can feel blood seep out over my
hand and i pull back.
"fuck you," i manage, as i push him backwards and drop
down to the floor, getting his key chain off his ample
waist once i have that, i get up and head for the door
again.
none of the other men come close to me. i guess they're
worried that if i could use that sword in cold blood on
a police officer, i wouldn't think twice about using it
on them. and they're right. i have no intention of
being dead. i just want to get the hell away. i get over
to the panel and force leo's imprint back into my mind,
half-turned towards the crowd and waving the sword back and
forth, back and forth.
this time, i slip through the door, but force my own
imprint on it - triggering one of the few traps i have
left, that i didn't think to use the first time around.
this time, it's going to be difficult to get rid of my
imprint - at least, unless leo wants to shut down the door
and bring it back. and i know that's a lot of trouble.
so i head straight down to the exit and step through. i
figure they're going to keep to their deal. if i get out,
i stay alive.
for the sheriff's cruiser. he really *was* a cop. which
is going to make this a lot more difficult than it already
is. it's cold out here and the lights of the city are
distant. i'm going to have to find the right key for the
car...and quickly. otherwise exposure to the cold *is*
going to become an issue.
car door, trying to find the right one. i've tried six
keys when there's commotion behind me. leo and his friends
have reset the door. i can hear them, because they're
yelling all the way from the other side of the bar. some
of them are even coming out the front door now. the
seventh key fits. gratefully, i scramble into the car and
slam the door shut. i bang the key into the slot ignition
slot and start the car. i'm thankful that there's no alarm
systems - or that they've been turned off. evidently, the
sheriff couldn't be bothered with security on his own car,
which is just as well.
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:road to nowhere, band:talking heads, album:little
creatures]
-----------------------------------------------------------
i put my foot to the accelerator and drive. the leather
interior of the car is strange against my skin, but i'm not
worried about that yet - there'll be time to find clothes.
later. when i'm somewhere else. as i push forward, the
lights of the car come on and there's bodies in front of
me. i keep baring down on the men who have come to greet
the sheriff's car and they back away - just in time.
i can hear the tyres fold inwards as i hit eighty miles an
hour - and suddenly, the car takes off into the air. it's
a hover-car. i steer towards the road that will lead to
safety and drive, putting as many miles between me and the
bar as i can.
up the car's connection to the world. starting, partially
at the road and partially at the computer monitor, i
discover something i thought might be a problem, but really
isn't. while the car is capable of broadcasting it's
position, it currently isn't. the sheriff really must have
let security lapse, but then i *do* discover something that
is problematic. when i entered the car, it figured out
that i wasn't the right driver - and while it's going to
let me get a few miles away from the bar, it's not going to
let me get all the way. it's shut off the energy tank.
the car is running on close to empty and i have no way of
overriding this piece of hardware, because it looks like it
is built-in and not controlled by the software in the car
itself. it looks very much like it's keyed to something
else. following the road, i go as far as i can. then the
car stalls and floats back down to the ground and stops.
pretty much deserted. in all the time i've been driving on
the highway, i haven't seen another car. this does not
bode well. i sit in the warmth of the car for a few
seconds, considering my options. sliding the door open, i
make my way to the trunk of the car and open it. there's
stuff in here, but none of it is remotely useful. the
one change of clothes is enormous, but i climb into it,
anyway. at least it'll keep me warm. well. kind of.
no jacket, but there is some money and a spare gun. i
slip the sword into one of the oversized pockets, slip
the gun into another, shut the boot of the car and begin
walking.
the cold does begin to bite into me. i look back at the
cruiser and stare at the road. there's no way to hide
the car and no way i'm going to make it to the city. i'm
going to die of exposure, or i'm going to die when one of
those jerkoffs from the bar comes across the cruiser. i
have to choose. exposure sounds better.
clothes and then, finally, drop to the side of the road as
snow begins to fall all around me. for a while, i lie
there, monitoring my vital statistics as they begin to slow
down - and then i flatline.
-----------------------------------------------------------
[minus one]
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:roads, band:portishead, album:dummy]
-----------------------------------------------------------
i wake up to motion. it's a lot warmer and needles and
pins are creeping up all over my body. i'm in clothes that
actually fit - and a huge blanket is around me. somewhere
ahead of me, i can see a vast form as it drives.
"yeah," i manage.
"good. i thought i might have gotten to you too late."
i lie there for a minute. this makes no sense.
"why'd you rescue me?"
"because i made you a deal. you manage to get out and you
stay alive. if you don't get out, you die."
i nod. i guess he's a man of his word.
"where are you taking me?"
"to somewhere warm and safe," he replies. and then...
"sleep."
i comply. whatever else, hopefully the nightmare is over
now.
the car has stopped. he climbs out of his side of the
car and then comes over to me. i slide out of the blanket,
the needles and pins seem to have stopped. sitting on the
edge of the seat, with the door open above me, i look over
at the house.
"this isn't a shelter."
and it isn't. it's far too massive for that - it's at
least three stories high. in some of the windows, lights
are burning and it looks more like...a mansion than a
shelter.
"it isn't," he says, as he kneels down next to me, checking
to see if everything is ok. "it belongs to a friend of
mine."
"your friend - what is he going to do?"
he chuckles. "make sure no one can find you. all of those
guys at the bar were briefed to some degree on who you
were."
this goes without explanation. someone needs to set up a
new identity for me - and while i can do the software part,
i can't do the hardware part - at least, not without money.
"come on," he says.
i get up and walk next to his immense frame as we head on
over to the door of the house. it's impressive. real oak.
he presses a button, by the side of the door and within
seconds a construct has opened it and is welcoming us
inside.
as to why we're here and then shows us to a plush sofa.
together, we sit down and wait. the construct comes back
and we're lead upstairs. the construct opens a door, and
we're ushered into the office. "my apologies," the asian
man says, softly, "my master will be right through to see
you in a few seconds." with that, he vanishes, and the
door that we entered through clicks shut. again, we sit
down together and wait. it doesn't take long.
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:the eyes of truth, band:enigma, album:the cross of
changes]
-----------------------------------------------------------
from one of the side doors that lead out of the office, he
arrives. it's sherriff wolf.
"what..?"
i get up and run.
"aww, shit boy," the sherriff grins. "you're in my domain
now." and the door locks, as i reach it. i can hear it go
click as i scramble up against it.
leo clears his throat.
"when i said...i'd made a deal with you," he rumbles, "i
didn't say you got out. in fact, i distinctly remember you
still being on the inside of the bar, the first time that
sheriff wolf here put a hand on your shoulder."
"how...?"
sheriff wolf rumbles, with pleasure, as he looks me over.
"you don't think...in all my time being a cop, that i
haven't dealt with little runts like yourself?"
"the cubicle..."
and now it's leo's turn. "if you checked properly, you
*were* getting to the outside world, but you were being
routed through my servers. and my servers watch all the
traffic going in and out of that little room. while you
thought you had them fooled, you weren't watching for a
set of backups.
shit. yes. the numbers looked all wrong, because they
were pointing to an internal network - and i'd never
checked.
"now, you have two choices," leo says. "you can go
quietly, or you can struggle. i don't think it matters
much to sheriff wolf."
i grimace at the cliche, but it's true. there is nowhere
left to run to. it's just leo, the sheriff and myself now.
"look," i try, desperately. "i can help...i can help you
find the others, if you want. i can help you stop the wave
of hackers that's destroying corporate america."
the sheriff just chuckles.
"if i were worried about that, son, we would have got you
to work for me a long, long time ago."
and i know he's right. while i'm good, i'm also a loner.
i never joined any of the groups around me, because i
didn't like hacking for a team. and as a result of that, i
was one of the last free agents left. any salary i was
making could have easily been doubled, or trebled by the
police. they would have come for me as soon as they needed
me and given me the option. work for them, or eternal jail
time.
"now," the sheriff says, languidly, "it's been a long three
hours. that cut you gave me was annoying and i had to have
my technician bought in. i hope leo hasn't left you with
any cunning plans."
leo shakes his head. and then he grins.
"come on, boy. time to choose."
i hesitate...and then i run for the window. it's two
stories up. if i can get out of the window, i can maybe
survive.
for a second it feels like something might have snapped -
like he might have broken my backbone, but then i'm ok
again, the augments in my body finding and fixing the
broken cartilage.
"it looks to me like it's going to be a struggle," the
sheriff comments. "i like that."
and with that, leo hoists me up to my feed. i can feel
his hands...change...as he's holding me. one second his
ham-like fingers are warm against my body, where the shirt
has ridden up a little from his forceful attack. the next
second they're cold - steel-cold. he's developed claws.
without thinking twice, the claws rip the fabric of the
shirt off of me. i'm up against the wall, staring out of
the window - down at metropolis, all ablaze with lights,
as his huge body stands behind mine, tearing my clothes
off. i elbow him, to get him off of me and reach for the
window, trying to force it open.
leo's claws are hands again, as he reaches around me and
forcibly pulls me away from the window.
"no, you don't." he rumbles. my jeans fall away from me
as i'm thrown across the room to the couch. sheriff wolf
seems to be enjoying the show. he's grinning and going for
a cigar.
and with that, he marches on over to me, ripping the rest
of my clothes off of my body.
i look up at him - self-confident and huge, and try rolling
to one side, to get off the couch, but leo's there.
"didn't say you could go anywhere."
and with that, he presses me onto the length of the couch.
now my legs are dangling off the one end and my head is
dangling off the other. i want to roll off the couch, to
somehow dash for the desk, but the sheriff is there.
one hand grabs my legs as that cigar dangles, obscenely
from his lips.
"it won't hurt. at least i'm not like some of those other
assholes who have huge barbeque spikes for a boy's ass in
their hands, boy. be thankful one of those bastards didn't
catch you."
he pauses, briefly, to take the cigar out of his mouth and
place it into an ashtray that's built into the wall.
literally, right into the wall where he's standing. i
didn't notice it before. it must be part of the firmware
of his office.
"let's see now," he says, thickly. that walrus-like
moustache coasting up on his lips. "i think that asshole
of yours could use a good fucking before we commence with
the festivities."
and with those words, a ham-like hand unzips his trousers
and he's naked. while i'm gay, i've never been fucked. it
just hasn't come up before. i've fucked other men, but
it's never happened that someone's fucked *me* before.
he's huge. even down there and even at his immense weight,
he's huge. i look down once and try to pull away from the
hold his hand has on my feet...
leo's holding my shoulders, his huge beard is almost
obscuring everything around me as it trickles down and
falls onto my smaller body. he's just watching the sheriff
and waiting for orders now.
i try and hit at leo...but it doesn't help. leo's
impervious to my little fists, beating at his huge body.
within seconds of being trapped on the couch, the sheriff's
dick slides up inside me. no lubrication except for the
precome that he was oozing, possibly all the time i was in
his office. maybe before...that's the only lubrication i
have as what feels like seven or eight thick inches pounds
right into me.
i start screaming. it's painful.
i hear the sheriff's voice above my own yelling. "shut the
fuck up, boy."
i can't. it hurts too much, but then leo comes to my
rescue. deftly, with one hand, he pulls his own dick out
and shoves it into my lips. for a second i think to clench
down on it - to bite it off, but leo warns me before hand
by making those ham-like figners of his turn to steel
again. the message is implicit. sheriff wolf might kill
me, but at least it'll be painless. well. i hope it'll
be painless, anyhow.
out...in and out..."oh yeah," he murmurs as he takes his
time. "i can see why all those men at the bar wanted a
crack at you, boy. you must be virgin. or very close..."
i can't answer - leo's fuzzy, round belly is trapping me
underneath himself as he feeds me his shaft - it's not as
vast as the sheriff's, but it is pretty big - big enough to
make sure no words come out around it, at very least.
climax. shuddering and dripping sweat over me as he builds
up steam. i can literally feel him slap against me every
time he slides in. he breaks for a few seonds, i assume
that he's smoking his cigar, but he's still in me...then
the raping begins afresh. this time harder.
gag around him until i relax - he's not going to let me go
unless i take him all in and swallow his come. around me
i can feel leo's hands slide off of my little body as he
reaches for his clothes, pulling them off. now my whole
universe is his silver belly-fuzz and the warm folds of
skin that underlie it.
few minutes, i'm trapped between the two huge bodies, the
sheriff pounding my behind, while leo has his way with my
mouth. it's painful - and by the time it's all over, my
tears are running down leo's fuzzy, round belly. i'm
still struggling, but my struggles are weak against their
combined weight and power.
it takes the sheriff marginally less time to shoot into me,
maybe because i'm a virtin, but i feel warm rivulets of his
semen spurt up inside me, even as leo's dick is obscuring
every breath i take. i'm only just getting air through my
nose, even though that's almost covered in leo's belly...
black out. when i come to, things have changed again. the
sheriff's dick has exited my behind - leo's heavy weight is
still piledriving me back and forth on the couch. my small
body is sticking to it. it must be made of leather, though
none of that matters. what matters most is that i can feel
something warm beginning to slither up my legs. maybe it's
all over. while leo's still pounding into my mouth, i hope
for the first time. maybe all the stuff leo has said about
me ending up dead is false...and for a while, that's what i
believe. i'm too weak to fight and too tired to care, so i
pray that the warm feeling slithering up my legs is my them
clothing me.
me somewhere. leo is in the process of finally letting his
copious load go. it seems like forever as his semen gushes
into my throat. it feels as if he's waited for this moment
for a very long time, because warmth floods into me without
much regard for whether i can take it or not. as the fluid
slides into my mouth, i choke and then cough, but it is now
done and leo eases up off of me. his heavy gut is swinging
over me, but at least i can breathe again. the warmth that
might be my clothes is slowly making it's way up my calves,
across my knees. leo kneels down, over me, warm tresses of
his beard and hair obscuring everything. his face is all i
can make out, anymore. he looks like jesus.
tongue sliding into me. he rumbles, huskily and then pulls
back a few inches. "even now," he says, deep voice washing
over me, "the sheriff is having you for his dinner."
but leo simply takes my head in his huge hands and holds me
still. "he's working his way up your legs now." i know he
isn't lying. i can feel the warmth slowly inching it's way
up my body. "no," i whisper, "please, god, no. anything,"
i sob, "i'll do anything."
"just relax," the basso profondu voice rumbles. "be still.
if you be still, it'll all be over soon."
the wolf, i begin to kick and flail a last time. this most
certainly is not how i envisioned my end coming. i open my
mouth to plead and go from pleading to screaming. for leo,
this is of little consequence, he lowers himself again, his
lips to mine and every whimper is cut off.
my midriff. i can definately hear slurping sounds, now, as
sheriff wolf's enormous tongue bathes me in saliva. i know
what he's doing and i almost gag on leo's tongue, but warm,
thick fingers close around my neck and i don't. as i'm fed
into the maw of the sheriff, he is tasting me. i'm now far
enough along that i can feel his walrrus-like moustache run
along my dick, up along my midriff. i begin to kick again,
trying to force my way up. up and hopefully out, but there
will be no such heroics. instead, he lifts me a little way
off the couch. i'm high enough that i can't reach anything
remotely solid, but not high enough that i'll be hurt if he
should drop me. leo holds my head, as he comments that i'm
almost in up to my stomach. i don't need him to tell me, i
can feel. hungry slurps inexorably work their way along my
small body until there is very little room for leo anymore.
at this point, i'm almost all the way into the sheriff, his
warm body throbbing around me, taking me in. i realize, to
my complete horror, that i can feel his throat, as it works
to gulp me down. leo doesn't quite let go of me. his warm
hands stroke at my back as he sucks an ear into his lips.
"hmmmph," he comments, and then, huskily:"it's a shame that
i'm not the one to have you." he laughs into my ear. "you
know that i can taste the fear on you." he breathes a warm
breath into my ear. "soooo gooood..."
i'm right up against his walrus-like moustache. from here,
i can see his eyes half-slit, watching me. most of my body
is already cramped into the warm heat of his belly and it's
a struggle for me to get footing. there's simply nowhere i
can go. leo turns my head a little, his lips pressing over
mine a last time. "down you go, boy," are the last words i
hear anyone speak, as the sheriff slurps his tongue over my
face and then gulps me down. trapped in his mouth, i smell
the fetid and dank smell of his breath. there is no light.
sheriff finishes what he started so many minutes ago. with
one last gulp, he deposits me into his waiting belly, which
sags immensely as it takes me in. i can feel it all around
me, pressing in on me heavily. holding me down.
-----------------------------------------------------------
[song:gave up, band:nine inch nails, album:broken]
-----------------------------------------------------------
and then, i remember. i'm vat born. my body has a defense
system against this, and so, i make my last request.
"please...somebody...anybody...help me..."
and i let myself expire.
the extended sensors that are recording my life get a final
few moments of blackness, before the huge man starts making
me a part of him. i don't feel it when the acids come. in
time, the disk slides out of it's slot in my neck.
the disk drops to his stomach and stays. waiting...
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[time:shortly after dark]
[date:eleven august, twenty one forty three]
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[song:pyramid song, band:radiohead, album:amnesiac]
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four days later, the sheriff wakes up, leo at his side.
it's been four very languid days. many times over the last
few days, he's rolled the huge bartender onto his vast gut,
so that he can have his way with him. it passes time.
the disk on the first day. sheriff wolf is very aware that
it will take some time to find the right place on the disk,
but he's a patient man. on the third day, the little whelp
shows back up on his videophone. he knows where it starts.
and sheriff wolf knows it's time to get to work. groggily,
he sits up, heavy, ponderous belly bigger now. he slaps at
leo's ass to wake him. and leo knows. it's time to go.
it doesn't take long for him to clear out. as he makes his
exit, he drops a card onto the desk. recognizing the card,
the wood of the desk gives way to electronics and for a few
split seconds, the desk looks like an electronic scheduler.
the sheriff gets dressed. slowly, heavily, he pulls up his
comfortable chair and sits down to watch the edited version
of events. sitting back, he strokes his vast paunch, eyes
at slits and grinning. in three months time, there will be
another rabbit, but for now, there's one more boy fattening
his middle...
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[song:hunting bears, band:radiohead, album:amnesiac]
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the man behind the desk is impressively large - probably
in fact...
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[commentary]
[twenty four june, two thousand and three]
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this is easily the longest piece of writing i've done in
ages. and yes, i regard it as almost entirely plotless
and driven by the sole construct of the bar scene, no bar
scene, no sheriff.
one place and ended up entirely at another. [giantguy
*might* very well recognize this as a piece of roleplaying
he and i did, well over a year ago, but...bastardized,
somewhat.] - i do like two things about this story, though,
the first is it's plausibility. it is very possible that,
given enough time, we might find ourselves in exactly this
situation, where people are able to modify themselves, at
will, to be able to do things they wouldn't necessarily be
able to - and this was what i was broadly hinting at in
the foreward. this is a very speculative type of vore i
haven't seen before. [at least, the science part of it is
very speculative.]
quite literally, was to build a story around a particular
mood, or ethos - and this, at least, i think i've somewhat
succeeded in. while i've actively used pieces of music as
cornerstones for other stories, i haven't ever intergrated
them this much into the writing.
is exactly as it was intended. when i sat down to write
this, almost a year ago, i had it pegged as
not-a-moral-ancedote. i wanted to write something that
would explore future technology - explore [to a degree]
fear and explore manipulation/distortion of fact. i think
i've succeeded in those areas. as always, this is an
ongoing process. this one, for me, personally, is more
miss than hit.
violent than i originally envisioned it. i'm not sure if
the year it sat simmering in my head toned it down, or if
it simply wasn't that violent a piece to begin with, but
the net result is that the violence, while there, isn't all
*that* disturbing. at least...not to my mind. [and it
*does* fit the tone/context of the story...]
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[copyright notice]
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this text copyright (c) 2002, 2003 julian comley, nicodemus
caine, greywolfe and lostwolfe]
left at:greywolfe@new.co.za personal attacks to the author
can be sent there too. be warned that most of those wind
up either in dev/null/ [yes, i really *am* a unix freak ;)]
or...on a bad day i'll just mail your root back with copies
of your witty dialogue.]
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